"Is it Black or White''
And you see it is rainbow coloured.
This has been my experience since a child.
I wanted to say
"Why are you asking that question it does not make sense."
In primary school I would sit under the table in class.
I did not want to sit at tables learning stuff that though I understood did not make sense.
I then went to Covent.
The Covent had a Sacred Grotto to Mother Mary.
I literally saw the Queen of Fairies. And was so happy.
I remembering skipping among the Fairies.
The nuns looked at me in dismay and stopped me dancing.
One year at the Covent each child was set the task of doing good deeds and then writing an essay about them.
My parents were so dsyfunctional in so much pain they were unable to send love to themselves. Let alone be charitable to others.
So I had no charitable deed.
The days the weeks went on and the deadline to present an essay
loomed closer and closer.
Every child did amazing charitable things.
And wrote beautiful essays about them.
So I made mine up. I wrote a story.
I felt for sure everyone knew it was a lie.
But no one said.
The children with the best charitable deeds were given the prize of standing up in the whole school and reading them out.
I so wished I had done a charitable deed.
And my parents laughed at me and my story.
They did not ask why I made up the story. Or what the story was about.
For me as a child so much was a lie.
What was the difference between a story and a lie.
I realised questions were in fact set answers.
I did not see the point in learning set answers to the set answers.
It was all a game.
I did try fitting in for many many years.
Until I realised not fitting in was is a blessing.
That nearly everyone else feels they do not fit in.
That everyone else was pretending.
Now I am with others who are no longer pretending.
Who are daring to BE questions with no set answers.
Who are unravelling.
Unravelling the lies.
And are singing the rainbow
As rainbow children.
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